Sunday, 27 March 2011
Scared and alone
I feel the need to write, like some how it will erase my mind and the thoughts will stop. I don't feel brave tonight, I feel alone, I miss Stu and my Mum I wish one of them was here to cuddle me to sleep and tell me its all OK, that we will get through this, sometimes I can't always be Strong for everyone and tonight this is one of those night. I don't feel like I'm getting better, just plodding along in the mess and nothing will ever get better only worse. I hate that cf is at the for corner of my every thought and every status update is about how ill I feel. I hate that I have no good news, that i feel utterly rubbish and desperate. I can't write anymore. So totally alone in this hospital room. Don't get me wrong tomorrow I will wake and I will be ready to face the world again, strong and determined, but tonight I'm taking a break.