The admission continued to be absolutely awful. The drugs gave me terrible side affects leaving me feeling awful. My joints became loose and would randomly pop out of place causing horrendous pain, my diabetes went from virtually none existent to making me feel physically sick due to high sugars that weren't controllable due to methyl pred. I felt bloated the whole time and ate loads. My skin seemed translucent and I felt just dreadful. The methyl pred made me feel like I was on edge and a group of people seemed like buzzing bees. Being in large crowed places when I had my face mask on was a no due to the sheer anxiety it brought. By the time it came to going home I was practically running out the door screaming even if my lungs weren't quite up to it yet. I'm pretty sure I had to check myself and make sure I didn't just start running.
I managed to escape last Tuesday which was a complete shambles. I was told I would be going home Monday to find out transport was not arranged, neither was any of the tests I needed before I left arranged. I spent Monday running around trying to sort it all and feeling extremely fragile. I did not go home Monday but I was moved to the family accommodation 'for my own benefit' in other words cutting costs and leaving me on my own with no one around when I was really not well enough because they wouldn't fork out a extra few quid for my mum to stay with me or to send me home that day. I can certainly say there was nothing about park wood that was for my benefit. So Tuesday I headed home on transport and proceeded to spend Wednesday and Thursday in my local having bloods done. My stomach stopped working and my kidney function was off but although I spent a length of time in the hospital I was glad to finally me home and back where I felt comfortable.
Friday finally I started to feel normal, my sugars were getting better my renal function picking up and the high dose steroid were coming down! Those things are toxic and possibly one of the worst drugs ever! I describe being on them as having a battery shoved where the sun doesn't shine and you spend the rest of the time having your body trying to vomit them out your mouth.
So feeling much better but due back in Harefield Monday me and stu took a mini break driving via the coast and then up to Harefield. Leisurely stopping where ever and having some us time. I cannot express how much I missed him so a little us time was needed. When I'm away from him I tend not to talk to him very much and when I do I make the conversations short. It's all part of my survival tactic. If I shut him out it doesn't hurt as much that I'm not with him. So we went to the cinema, bowling, shopping in various places and eating lots of food! (High dose steroids still affecting my appertiate).
So clinic Went well after over a week in Harefield and not seeing one consultant I actually saw the main man him self (never seen him in clinic before since having my tx) I panicked at first when I knew I was seeing him, I wondered if I had done something wrong or some results had come back but no I think it was just one of those occasions to catch up on how ide been since tx and that I was actually quite poorly when I left and the nurse who organises clinic realised I was struggling to stand due to being short of breath. Always a good reason to make sure everything's ok. But yes actually I was doing really well, the few days away had done me the world of good, my breathing is getting back to normal, I'm still not quit there but recovering quickly considering and all in all It was a good meeting to touch base on a few things and made some of the confidence come back I had perhaps lost in my health due to being so poorly this time.
Me and stu before clinic
So all in all I'm ready to get back to the gym and start kicking ass! I was gyming 5 days a week before this, pole training, aerial acrobatics training and yoga. I full expect to be back doing all of that over the space of two weeks and also to cut down the copious amounts I'm eating, which to be fair iv not gained any weight on the steroids but lost it, but I can't live eating this much!
So now I'm back home, teaching but I still have a week off from next which is great as it really gives me chance to get my strength back. So a bit of a long slog of a blog. I will update soon on my progress getting back into my hectic schedule!
P.s I did ask stu to prof read this but he protested saying he likes to read it when he's on the loo so sorry for any mistakes! Lol
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